“House,” aka “Hausu”
To start off, we’re talking about “House” (Hausu), not “House,” the 1980s horror flick with the dude from “Night Court” or “House,” the current television hit staring Hugh Laurie. This is the avant-garde Japanese film from the 1970s, which somehow resurfaced as a cult hit last year. That should tell you everything you need to know. This is the type of film you’d watch on the basis of its movie poster alone, given you were into movie-poster art, and you could track down a copy (lucky for us, there’s Netflix). In one respect, it’s a simple ghost stories — seven school girls take a trip to the country, to an old, dilapidated house, and they fall prey to the ghost living inside. Then, they die off one by one. But “Hausu” is also a product of its time, its place and the director’s artist vision, and that makes it acid-trip crazy. There’s a flesh-eating piano, a killer light fixture and a room full of blood. Oh, and a fluffy white cat with an evil glint in its eye (literally). Make no mistake, “Hausu” is visually stunning, but it’s weird (so, so weird) and probably not accessible to any mass audience. Of course, mass audiences love “Little Fockers,” so … (shoulder shrug).
You’ll like this if: you liked “Cemetery Man” or are a fan of Dario Argento.
“House of the Devil”
Some horror flicks rely on the big boo, the bang-and-scream loud noise that gets you jumping in your seat. Others rely on watch-through-your-fingers blood and gore, the spatter effect. Some are more subtle than all that. They build the fear slowly, quietly and let it fester until you’re not exactly sure why you’re so freaked out. That’s the creep factor and “House of the Devil” is deep in it. This is a throw-back film, set in the 1980, and it is shot and directed accordingly. Director Ti West and cinematographer Eliot Rockett created a movie in 2009 that looks, sounds (is there anything creepier than a rotary phone ringer) and more importantly, FEELS like it was made in the ’80s. Story wise, it isn’t anything too original — a broke college student (Jocelin Donahue) finds a job as a babysitter that turns out to be more than she bargained for. Like, WAY more. Though it might be a bit too subtle for some tastes, and nothing much happens for the majority of the film (when it does … the devil you say?), the tone and mood more than make up for any shortfalls and there are some great performances by Tom Noonan (who is super, uber creepy) and Greta Gerwig, who dies too soon and is not naked (a clear indication this is not a real ’80s flick).
You’ll like this if: “Rosemary’s Baby” didn’t bore you.
“Splice”
There is something almost beautiful about the monster in Vincenzo Natali’s “Splice.” Almost, because the creature has an animal’s legs and a tail and dark eyes that are set just a bit too wide to be human. And, well, because it ends up doing what monsters do best — killing and destroying everything in sight. But that happens later, after two scientists (a boyfriend/girlfriend team played by Andrien Brody and Sarah Polley) create the thing from spliced DNA and name it Dren and take it in to raise as a pet (or more likely as a child). This is after it experiences something akin to a childhood and something akin to love. Of course, there is never a doubt that the thing will turn on its makers. The film is, after all, essentially a Frankenstein retelling, with high-tech labs and DNA in place of a castle and rotting body parts. Sure, there is some flimsy subplot about Polley’s mother, but the real message here is the pure Frankenstein — bad things happen to upiddy scientists who think they can know it all. Like, you might (SPOILER ALERT) get raped and impregnated. As a science fiction film, “Splice” is no epic. In fact, it’s mostly forgettable. But, the creature effects are good and the story is solid, and let’s be honest, you’ve spent time watching worse.
You’ll like this if: you think bald chicks are hot.